Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Danne’s and other dangalang

It was hot and the priest was rude. The obsequious required of us was not really to my taste either especially for someone who can’t remember a name, when that’s all they really have to do.

The most I could muster was a half bend at the waist, the task of remembering something that I really don’t want to, for the sake of absolving a non-forgivable guilt. I’m never sure what they expect of me…do they expect me to garner ping by feeding some people who have nothing better to do than sit on their asses all day and get fed once a day by fools?

Am I supposed to remember something I cannot, a voice that I can’t remember hearing, a betrayal that’s left me with multitudes of demons to fight without guidance?

To me it’s just bullshit. I’d rather forget, it might as well be any other day as far as I fucking care.

But then I don’t share in their guilt.

2 comments:

PseudoRandom said...

With regards to the priest...it's unfortunate that you had to encounter one of those priests. As difficult as it is, I think in times like that you kinda have to focus on the robe and forget the person wearing it. Maybe instead of treating the alms giving as 'feeding some self-important old man', it might be worth treating it as 'showing gratitude to the ideals represented by the robe'? Alms givings are supposed to be symbolic anyway; it's Sinhalese culture that has bastardised the whole thing. I know it's frustrating and disheartening, but that's the only way I get through boring sermons...perhaps it'll work for you?

Dee said...

mmm...yeah, what P said. :) I feel yea. we had a pirith for my sis last night coz shes getting married. and the priest was from our gemei pansala, they are a unaffected bunch. very simple and quite nice. he was talking about marraige and where buddhism comes in..interesting. and where it can go wrong and how some people call up the temple to ask for help. I dunno...i guess there's both sides to it. I don't belive in feeding priests for ping either. I mean, if you don't have dhamma in the heart..whats the point huh? :S sorry,,rambly comment.. prolly didnt make sense..