Thursday, February 11, 2010

I know what you did last night

It was murder most foul, but I had no choice. As I switched on the lights his feelers twitched in surprise and I noted with distaste that he was precariously close to my toothbrush. Using the only deadly weapon at hand, my Bata health slipper (the bumps give an extra zip to its zap) I cautiously moved the cockroach over to a more accessible location, playing him quite adroitly if I do say so myself. Once he was on the door I leaned over, pulled back and slapped him with the Bata health slipper, the one with the bumps.

As he lay twitching I gave him one more tap on the head…then for good measure folded the mat over him and stepped down. Still he twitched…but thinking it was his death throes I congratulated myself and went in for my shower. Drying myself off I stepped into the bathroom area.

For a moment I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with the familiar scene. The blue-green mat looked oddly bereft. Then it struck me.

He was gone…feelers and all.

Now all I can think of is that he’s out there, plotting sweet revenge, all 5 centimeters of him. And everytime I switch on the bathroom light I do it with caution. After all..he lives where I live.

14 comments:

who else but me said...

hehee :D i commit such murders quite often in the name of protecting my sister. who happens to pretty much break into hysteria when one is anywhere about.

how do u stand bata health slippers? they feel like someone's tickling ur feet all the time!

Rhythmic Diaspora said...

What colour were the Health slippers? These details are important. Perhaps, had it been a regular bata, without the bumps, the impact would have been more severe and finished him off. Perhaps he's hiding under your keyboard as you read this N.

Sabby said...

The basterd!
He shall return!

PseudoRandom said...

So you can stare a leopard in his face and focus enough to take a beautiful photo, but you can't let a poor lil cockroach live in your bathroom? Tsk tsk.

:D

オテモヤン said...

オナニー
逆援助
SEX
フェラチオ
ソープ
逆援助
出張ホスト
手コキ
おっぱい
フェラチオ
中出し
セックス
デリヘル
包茎
逆援
性欲

Delilah said...

O brave one, come live with me? :P

pissu perera said...

centipedes AND cockroaches? what a wuss!

N said...

April Fools - hehe...I like the health slippers...it's like a continuous massage:)

RD- Black. I think the health ones have more momentum than the regular ones! I checked under the keyboard...nothing but a discreet velociraptor there:D

Sabby - I'll get him then!

Psuedo - well the leopard isn't in the bathroom though! Admittedly a rubber slipper may not be enough then.

Delilah - only if you promise to do that thing you do with the Nutella :P

Pissu - I run from scorpions...I kill cockroaches...you can't compare the two!

Savindri said...

murderer!!! thats terrible

Sabby said...

N & Delilah: You two are scandalous!! :P

Scrumps said...

Loooooooool! I can see this as a great horror!

"N and the Revenge of the Cockroach"

Seesaw said...

You should have relieved him of his twitchy misery and just flattened him one shot. Ouch, that sounds brutal. Death by Mortein spray is so much easier to live with, invest in a can asap!

Delilah said...

lol. i'll get the nutella. you get the spoon :)

Angel said...

(shudder)! Poor cocky-roach... I bet he was semi stunned with bathroom fumes and running around trying to find a way out!